Hey, guys. How’s it going? I hope everything is awesome, and you’re re-adjusting swimmingly to work or school now that the holidays are over.
I know I was supposed to be taking a break from posting anything remotely controversial – that is, for the most part, anything political or religious.
But, spiritually speaking, I have something that’s been on my heart. Sidebar – how cheesy is that phrase? Having something on your heart. Like having something on your mind but it’s so emotionally charged that it’s weighing on your heart? It reminds me of this video, which you should really go watch because it is hilarious and accurate and it’s something light-hearted for you to enjoy before I get somewhat serious up in here.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
So awhile back I wrote several posts that included words that expressed my frustration with believers, specifically self-professed Catholics, who “blindly accept” everything the Church teaches. A friend whom I love dearly made me realize that the times I said that, along with the rhetoric surrounding that proclamation, I was overly harsh.
Many of those who do indeed accept every single thing that the Church teaches have studied and prayed and discussed much of the doctrine in order to fully understand why the Church teaches what it does and have chosen to believe. and that is not only just fine, it’s also awesome, and, it’s their own faith and therefore their own business unless they choose to discuss it with me or another person. It is completely awful of me to attack them for it. And that’s true even for those who haven’t studied and prayed and whatnot – a person believes what they choose to believe, and well, that’s kind of their right, as a person.
I apologize to anyone who was offended by my words. Often I really want to stand by what I wrote on this blog regardless of whose feelings I’ve hurt, but I think maybe I overstepped on that one.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The thing is, I think at least part of the reason I tended to say things like that was because I was receiving a fair amount of flack myself, for being a Catholic who does NOT accept everything that the Church teaches. In particular, some fellow Catholics seemed more offended by my varied views, especially because I’m a recent convert. And well, that hurt my feelings.
It hurt my feelings for two reasons, the first being what I discussed above. My beliefs are my own. Even if I label myself Catholic, I am still free to choose what I do and do not believe under Catholic doctrine. I realize that the idea is that at confirmation you are publicly asserting that you believe in the Church and everything She teaches, and on a basic, general level, I do assert that very thing. I do believe that the Church as a whole, despite what some key members may say or do, is at the very least well-intentioned. (Maybe that’s a poor way of putting it; please don’t attack me for it.) But I also think we are not being realistic if we think a person can really agree to all of that at confirmation.
I mean, think about it. Most of those raised in the Church get confirmed in high school. No one at that age knows enough about their faith, the Church, or the world, to be 100% that they back the Church in every single instance. and in fact, really, at what age does anyone ever know enough about all of those things to say that without a doubt? Obviously that’s where faith comes in, and I know that’s the argument of many. But the fact is, I sort of agreed to believe in everything the Church teaches without knowing everything the Church teaches, as many other people also do.
Related, the second reason it hurts to be attacked for not agreeing with everything the Church teaches is that I’m not even close to being the only one. I’d venture to say that at least half of my own Catholic friends do not back the Church in everything, even if they’re not vocal about it. And there are groups like Catholics for Choice. And we know from studies that a significant number of Catholics have used or currently use contraception. So I’m clearly not the only one who professes to be a Catholic but opposes some Catholic beliefs.
Not only that, we know that the Church isn’t perfect. The Church as an institution has quite a history of being wrong. Again, I believe that the Church as a body of believers is well-intentioned, and tries to fix the things that need to be fixed once problems become apparent.
The other thing is that I’ve experienced this even before becoming Catholic, because I certainly didn’t agree with everything in the Lutheran Church either. and I had people tell me that maybe I wasn’t really a Lutheran, or even a Christian, because of it. Doesn’t that sound silly? Because how else did we get so many religions and denominations within religions other than because some people within the group decided that they didn’t agree with and believe in everything that the group as a whole professed?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Now I’m not about to go start my own religion or denomination. and not just because it sounds like a shit-ton of work and I’m too lazy for that. But more so because I believe that it’s important to have a community, and particularly a community that is like-minded for the most part, but still with a variety of belief. I believe it makes for richer relationships, richer experiences, and a richer faith.
So you can be Catholic, or Lutheran, or Mormon, or Buddhist or whatever you choose to label yourself, and you can choose what you want to believe under that umbrella, whether it’s every single thing that religion teaches or whether you just like certain parts. and I am going to refrain from judging you for it, or at least as far as my imperfect self can manage.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Yes, I am a Catholic. and yes, I use contraception, and I am both against abortion but still pro-choice, and I think homosexuals should be allowed to get married, at least under the law even if the Church doesn’t recognize it, and I’ve actually never been to Reconciliation, and yet I still receive the Eucharist, and I think Mary is honored more highly than she should be, and I don’t actually believe that Jesus is “the only way” to “heaven” nor do I believe in purgatory. and there are probably other things I’m forgetting. But I’m still going to call myself a Catholic. No one else can take that from me. No one owns the label/term/word Catholic, not even the Church, really. and even if it did, well, I was still technically confirmed in the Church, I have a document to prove it, and I haven’t been excommunicated, so I’m Catholic anyway.
and if anyone has a problem with my Catholic cherry-picking, well, they can take their anger and disdain and shove it up their own ass. It will probably go really well with the stick they probably already have up there anyway.
I’m really confused. If you don’t believe in a lot of those things that the Church teaches, why did you want to become Catholic? What about it appealed(/appeals) to you?
Whew, I’m kind of glad and kind of scared that you asked that! haha. That’s whole ‘nother post, that I will try try try to get to soon!
Also, as I pointed out, I don’t believe in a lot of things that other denominations teach either. But I still would like a church home.
Also, also, I married a Catholic if you recall. In part, I became Catholic because Aaron and I agree that it will be easier to raise our children if we’re mostly on the same page, religiously speaking.
Oh also, just so you know, I have been reading your blog posts, even after you stopped posting them to your Facebook, and I almost commented on the ones about books, but then realized how little knowledge I have in comparison to other people and didn’t feel like it was worth it. So I haven’t been keeping up just so I could jump on you or anything! I hope you didn’t get that impression from my commenting only on this post and not the others, but on the off chance that I did give that impression I just wanted to clarify that.
Hmm. All of this is obviously not new information haha. But just some things I wanted to touch on.
I would really recommend going to Reconciliation. It’s not just reconciling things between you and God, but also with the Church and her other members. And we’re obviously not all perfect, but we’re called to strive to be. Also, though none of us are really ever “worthy” to receive our Lord under our roofs (of the temples that are our bodies), wouldn’t you want to get yourself as close to worthy as possible by being cleansed of your sin in confession? Idk if you took the time to read through my awakening talk that I posted, but there’s a lot of backstory there as to why I personally find it so important and how it’s help transform my faith.
What about purgatory makes you not believe in it? I mean, that’s just really sad to think about. The souls there are a very important part of the Church (The Church Suffering) who are constantly praying for us and constantly in need of our prayers. Like, if I have to spend time in purgatory after I die, then I would want all the prayers I could get so that I could get to heaven, rather than just people think I’m in a state that doesn’t exist. And why is heaven in quotes?
I guess you personally don’t feel like getting to heaven should be the ultimate goal for people on earth. I think that explains a lot of why you have the views you do. And I guess if you look at heaven being the ultimate goal, you’ll see why the Church teaches what She does. Eternal lonliness and separation from the Love of God (because of our own choice of rejecting it) seems like something nobody (God, least of all) would ever want.
Justin,
I know all of that about Reconciliation. I get it. It’s just something I’m choosing. It’s one of the things that I can appreciate the option, but since I grew up looking at Reconciliation, or confession, in a different way, I’m still kind of coming around, trying to grasp it. and I did read MOST of your talk. It was kind of long for blog format.
I struggle with the concept of purgatory because I struggle with the concept of Hell. Which is my cowardly way of saying I don’t believe in either and I’m not prepared to back it up right now.
…
And I’ve tried to reply to that last paragraph like 3 times now, and nothing is coming out right. I’ll work on that. This is something actually that my Lutheran pastor preached on at Sunday school one weekend when we were visiting my parents a few months ago, and I got soooo angry. I can’t even.
Yeah, I understand. I mean, I had a whole six years between my first confession and my second one. And yeah… I apologize for my laziness there haha.
That makes sense. It’s been said that the biggest lie the devil can feed people is to convince them that neither he nor hell exist. Why fear what isn’t there? Does that mean everyone gets to go to heaven? Or were the quotes on “heaven” reflecting that you might not believe in that either? Which might be part of your problem with the whole getting to heaven as the ultimate goal thing?
That might be totally wrong. My mind just had a lot of thoughts.
Like I’ve said before, there is a huge respect for an individual’s free will, but the Church wouldn’t be truly loving her flock if She didn’t do all that She could to get them
Basically, what I was getting at was that if the Church’s job is to get her members to heaven, then She does have to teach what She does, The Truth. And She does have to do what She can to help her flock avoid whatever does not bring them to heaven. Acting otherwise would not be truly loving her flock.
I’m looking forward to your next Faith Articles post in regards to Johanna’s questions up there though! It’s nice to hear both sides haha.
I also realize that my responses might sound a little dismissive or like I’m avoiding the questions. All I can say is that I will try to spend some time with them and come up with better answers. Hope that’s okay.
Pingback: The Faith Articles #17: On feeling “convicted” « Make Me a Tree